14 December 2011

Colonoscopy 1-ooohhhh-1. So I arrive at hospital reception..

 

"Well here's a familiar face" says reception. I'm not there for a nose job, it's a colonoscopy the greeting should be "Well here's another pain in the a..e !". Besides 5 years since last visit can't be that familiar. To the waiting area. Half a dozen already into books and mags."Hey Skip, you here for the same as me, must be an age thing...". It's Ettore, turns out his son played soccer with my young bloke, his wife Marissa had been to a couple of our listener lunches when I worked in radio. Colonoscopy world is so small.

"Hi I'm Barb, I'll be looking after you. You made me 4KQ's Mum of the Day, sent me flowers when I had my first baby, he's 30 now, by the way the Doctor's running behind."

 

I'm thinking colonoscopy world just got smaller and the doctor's been drinking the crap I've been drinking . Not only running behind, on my estimation Xmas is not looking good. He hasn't even arrived and there's 4 in front of me. 2.30 check in, 3.30 (approx)procedure. They expected him around 3pm.
"Hi Skip, what are you doing here ?"

 

It's Dave. Colonoscopy world is disappearing up its own clacker. Dave's on staff where I used to work. Told me I had a good run, he has some health problems, he's 32, collects tropical freshwater fish and likes the No. 14 pizza at Earth n Sea Wilston. We got to that while discussing Ettore's pizza oven. Ettore's a tile man who imports pizza ovens. He's put a couple in to B risbane City Soccer at Newmarket. They crank on a Friday/Saturday. Colonoscopy world is sooo social.

 I end up,and I mean end up meeting "doc" at 6. We discuss what he might find. He relates a "gerbil" story, how predictable, I went the zucchini, the nurse mentioned a carrot, I said no my hind sight is good, they giggle, then I get "Hello Ian". The clock says nearly 7 and "carrot" nurse tells me I'm in recovery and all done. Yahoo I still might make a Xmas Party with Helen.

 I'm now in a Jason recliner drinking ginger ale scoffing a few sangers catching up with Ettore and his wife, Dave walks in all ginger for his sangers, then we all wait to see "running behind" Doc.

 I left at 9.15, minus a polyp, and with a healthy good looking bowel."Let's do it again in 3 years". The time it took I should maybe just go back into the waiting room. You never know who you'll bump into.

My apologies for the long windedness..apparently you can expect that after a colonoscopy. I'm assured it will pass.

 

I could do with a laugh..anyone for "Carry On Up The Khyber ?"